The Compendium of Sluards

So the rumors were true....the Slaud's do have the power to anoint LB players (and perhaps the power to remove them as well). I always speculated but only after reading this can we say the rumors may very well be true

<insert mind blown gif>

Hook must have paid Slaud's with his soul - that is the only rationale expectation for the seemingly overnight jump to #1 on LB
 
ShadyMarine said:
-DVO- said:
I say kill the female sluard to stop these silly sluards from multiplying 
Click to expand...

Also, No Water and No Food

<insert Gizmo gif with Nic Cage Face>
Click to expand...

We are genetically constructed by CIA technicians in Sluardanamo Bay, as part of a related operation, Acoustic Kitty. Your threats about food, water, and killing hold no fear for us.

Sluardy fact: sluards like to barbecue, because they will only cook if there is an element of danger involved. ~ 999CE
 
I was so mad at Beenah that I forgot tonight's proverb.

Actions speak louder than words. Unless you are a Sluard, in which case you are louder than a Prius pumping a Mariah Carey Christmas remix. ~ 1799
 
I am trying to think of Sluard stories with happy endings. Which is hard cos te only way out is... By co-starring with Sylvester Stallone or death. Even we have limits. Stallone is responsiblily for a lot.
 
we need to identify who each sluard is! And How many! They are highly contagious!! People are lining up at Walmart buying nic cage movies!!some were heard muttering"would you farm me?""I'd farm me"
this is a definite sign of contagion spread, As sluards are known to talk too and argue with their selves.they have also been linked to hoarding of happy meal toys.
only the mighty nic cage can stop this madness
 
I like your style Prime! Just fill out our 600 question sheet and it's through to interviews.

Do not bite the hand that feed. Lick it instead. This is far more disturbing and achieves maximum impact. ~ Sluardy Etiquette, 1492
 
i heard the application is actually the Honolulu phone directory it's handed to you by a random hobo, who also passes you a note that reads"Memorize manual and use to decode" the rest of the message is encrypted gibberish...
A very Mysterious Group
 
random hobo maybe... But that's not all that happens. The hobo will quote a well known Nicolas Cage movie and the applicant has to tell which movie it is from, the exact time in the movie the quote was said, which phase of nic cage was nic cage when he said it. If you can say these correctly you will then get the 600 question application. If you fail the hobo will slap you 9001 times. So in my opinion becoming a Sluard is easier than one would expect, but we still haven't had anyone make it through to interview process...
 
SluardyFact: All sluards go Christmas Caging the days leading up to Christmas as well as the 2 days after Christmas!
What is Christmas Caging?
Good Question!!
Christmas Caging is when you go door to door dressed up as Nic Cage reciting various Nic Cage quotes whilst acting them out!
 
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