Feedback for Killer Reborn

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Lil_Tiger, Jun 14, 2013.

  1. Feedback, comments, concerns, questions, announcements and anything else can be posted here.

    Enjoy the story!
     
  2. What is the point of this thread may i ask? OOH i see you wrote a story... This i spam and is not necessary the people who read your story and have feedback can post on the main thread. Its a good read tho BTW.
     
  3. This allows for the main thread to be kept clean and smoother to read. I didn't do this for my first story, and I didn't like the look of it. It was choppy, unorganized and I was answering questions while try to post a chapter. So I'm trying this out, and seeing if people will be respectful to other readers and do what I asked.

    You have a problem with that?
     
  4. Hold on... The killer is a male... And you say he's a character from ki... But if its not tris or Chris... This is getting confusing.
     
  5. Yes yes it is. It's someone you wouldn't expect. But don't worry, it'll all be made clear soon enough.
     
  6. Ugh!
    Spoiler alert!!!
     
  7. sounds great :D I bet it'll be even better than the last one... Wait... is that even possible?
     
  8. someone you wouldn't expect... someone you wouldn't expect... Um uh... uh...
     
  9. Oh! Oh! Oh! I think I know who it is! :O But I'm not sure how much sense it would make...hmmm...
     
  10. Do guess Allioss! I'm curious to see what you think! You're very observant, so I'm interested to see if you picked up the clue.
     
  11. My guess is the first victim's little brother :3
     
  12. Interesting... You're quick. He's definitely a character. 
     
  13. You hooked me in Killer Inside, but this prologue seemed devoid of detail and description. You told us what happened instead of showed us. It's a good basic start but you could do better with your detail, I've seen it:) can't wait for more
     
  14. WW, the reason he did that is so we would have to keep guessing who the killer is.
     
  15. It is a bit slower but, yes. The point was to tell and not show. Not yet anyway. Don't worry, there will be plenty of showing soon enough.

    Btw, first chapter should be out Monday or Tuesday. This story will be a bit slower at the start; I'm doing more overall background and introduction. Will be interesting a soon enough though 
     
  16. Warry, I meant that even the scenery wasn't described very well. There's a lot more that could be done, depending on the intention of the writer (he/she?). Just didn't seem to grab the readers attention well. Just my opinion though. It's not bad, just pointing it out for future reference:)
     
  17. WW
    Neither was the first prologue.
     
  18. I KNOW WHO THE KILLER IS, I KNOW WHO THE KILLER IS
     
  19. What? I don't understand the point you're trying to make
     
  20. Actually I don't really know, it's just a guess