World of War feedback

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Chocolate_Milk2, Aug 8, 2010.

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  1. yes dark secret plz!!!
     
    #121 CrayzJayz, Aug 11, 2010
  2. K do u have pal cause I don't wanna give it away to others
     
    #122 Chocolate_Milk2, Aug 11, 2010
  3. Pal? Give away wat?
     
    #123 CrayzJayz, Aug 11, 2010
  4. I wouldn't want other ppl to find out about wat ur secret would be
     
    #124 Chocolate_Milk2, Aug 11, 2010
  5. K
     
    #125 CrayzJayz, Aug 11, 2010
  6. Oh palringo I can get it
     
    #126 CrayzJayz, Aug 11, 2010
  7. Bump
     
    #127 CrayzJayz, Aug 11, 2010
  8. Story is ok there r some grammer and spelling issues and the whole thing seems like 1 chap but it's still ok
     
    #128 *Bjorn21 (01), Aug 11, 2010
  9. good story
     
    #129 *cassandra101 (01), Aug 11, 2010
  10. Thanks for the encouragementbjorn lol
     
    #130 Chocolate_Milk2, Aug 11, 2010
  11. I'm a hard critic but it still a good story
     
    #131 *Bjorn21 (01), Aug 11, 2010
  12. Te grammar an spelling thingys I am working on
     
    #132 Chocolate_Milk2, Aug 11, 2010
  13. K just putting it out there
     
    #133 *Bjorn21 (01), Aug 11, 2010
  14. Cass liked it and I have some fans in my clan
     
    #134 Chocolate_Milk2, Aug 11, 2010
  15. It's a good story it just needs a few grammer tweeks
     
    #135 *Bjorn21 (01), Aug 11, 2010
  16. But i LOVE bjorns add sum flare too it read bjorns again and see if u get any ideas
     
    #136 *cassandra101 (01), Aug 11, 2010
  17. I'm a young writer so I was expecting my story to epic fail
     
    #137 *Bjorn21 (01), Aug 11, 2010
  18. Ok
     
    #138 Chocolate_Milk2, Aug 11, 2010
  19. I need to ask bjorn something
     
    #139 Chocolate_Milk2, Aug 11, 2010
  20. How do u keep the action and "flare" going throughout the entire chapter?
     
    #140 Chocolate_Milk2, Aug 11, 2010
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