Ok. I was trying to think what fit best and where. I coulda used more detail in beginning of chapter where alex helped Riann and Amber run to building
Actually, that part might not need too much, since you did discribe a bit what the pyramids looked like. But it's really your choice. I dont want to make you make any changes to your story that you don't want to make. I hate when people do that to me.
I think it's building itself up every chapter but i think you should read Harry potter it helps a lot with writing I've found. But I think it's pretty good keep informing me and I'll read on p.s I sorts like Harry potter it might not be your type of book though
At least gives me ideas and let's me know people are reading. Plus it bumps up thread which shows more people to read it
I'm on my iod I'll make a story up on the spot i'm 11 so don't make fun but when I edit and everything it's actually pretty good
Yeah I meant to do that in chapter one. Can't update Now cuz I barely ever able to get on comp. There is so much I left out
K chapter 4 out. It's a lot of dialogue and I know it can get confusing. Plz try to understand and watch quotation marks. They will help out with who is speaking
I finally added stuff. Had to get off comp really quick so I just updated forum and added brief description