Mad World I struggled to open my heavy eyelids. I forced the biggest yawn I could muster, and only managed to get them open halfway. My eyes scanned the room, trying to see anything through the blur. Nothing. Alls I could make out were white smudges and black smears. "Honey," My mother said. It felt so good to here her voice. In confusing times like these, her voice, sweet like honey, always takes some of the sting away. The power of love forced my eyes open all the way and made everything clear. A tear blossomed in my eye as I rescanned the room. It was the same as always. White walls. White sheets. Gray chairs, gray machines. Same old, same old. Everyday, I wake with a hope to be gone from here. I wake with hope to be gone from this hospital, to have the cancer gone from me. Yet everyday, everything's the same. I wish I was the type with que sera sera, attitude like my mom or my girlfriend, Layla. But that's not me. "Mom," I croaked. I couldn't stand to say much more. My voice, like my whole body was weak and different, and something I was ashamed of. As a guy, the last thing you want is to be skinnier than your girlfriend and to have your fifty year old mother, be stronger than you. "How are you Dylan?" She asked. Sick. Frail. Tired. Frustrated. Dying. I was all of the listed, but I couldn't tell that to my mother. As bad as it was for me, it must be worse for her. I can't even imagine having to watch your youngest child, dying from cancer, while your healthy on the sidelines. Helpless. "Ok, a little groggy," I sugar coated it as much as I could with out sounding phony. When I was first diagnosed, I was so optimistic. It was never, if I go home, it was always, when I go home. But, that was two years ago, and as I've gotten sicker, I've been losing hope. When I go home, turned to, if I go home, which evolved to, when I die. "That's good. We have an appointment with Dr. Greg, later today," My mom informed me. Weakly, I nodded. Meetings with my doctor, was actually an event I looked forward to. Dr. Greg, helped me understand what was going on. Something helpful in a whirlwind of confusion. The heavy,brown, door, opened up a crack. In walked a familiar figure. I would recognize that long, chocolate hair anywhere. It complimented, her olive skin, and emerald eyes beautifully. "Layla," I smiled.She made her way over, and sat on the edge of my bed. Layla can't stand the chairs at the hospital,she once asked me why they would make something to sit on, so uncomfortable. Layla had a great perspective on everything. Someday, she was going to be president. Of course I would miss that. "I'm going to leave you two love birds alone. Do you want anything from the cafeteria?" my mom rose from her seat. I was one of the lucky kids, whose parents know when he wants to be left alone. "How about some apple pie?" Layla suggested. My mom nodded and then left us alone. "How are you?" Layla asked concerned. This was the same question my mom had asked, but it had a whole different meaning this time. Layla, really wanted to know. She was a know nonsense girl, so naturally she wanted the truth. I always gave it to her, and she kept a straight face. But on the inside, I knew the truth was tearing her apart. But I would tell her the truth anyway. "I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad, the dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had," I expressed my deepest feelings through lyrics from Mad World. Layla stared at me with her emerald eyes, and searched my soul. She reached forward and embraced me in a hug. "It can't really be that bad," she finally said. My chest started to heave, and tears were streaming down my cheek. I cried into her shoulder. Layla, held me tight and rubbed my back. "Layla. Yesterday they offered me medical," I was in hysterics. "They offered me pot. And I kind of wanted it." I was sobbing. It was so sad. I always promised myself I would never do drugs, but here I am, kind of wanting it. Layla and I laid back. She put her head on my chest, and felt it shakily rise and fall. I slowly stopped crying. Right now Layla and I were together. It wouldn't be forever, but forever is overrated. Together now, in this mad world, was all that mattered. I stroked Layla's hair, and forgot my troubles.
“Mission Booted” The light clinking of glass bottles and the steamy bubbling floating out of each one was starting to get to Aethra Bloodraven’s head. Rolled up bits of parchment, each more scratched out and torn than the last, only emphasized how impatient she had been lately. The potions she was trying to draft up were too fizzy, too strong, too weak, or had a handful of unwanted side effects. Etched into her normally calm or indifferent face was a hard scowl as she crumpled up the last bit of parchment before letting out a deep sigh. Rubbing lightly at her temples, she tried to consider what she knew had to be done. Aethra recognized that she needed at least eight or more members in order for this mission to be successful, and so far she had recruited zero. Chemistry and brewing was a much easier task to her. It was okay if she failed in potions, she could always brew up something new and learn from her mistakes. In the case of her mission however, second chances weren’t as readily available to her. She knew her lack of connection towards magic and the elements were the reason most of her potions seemed to not bond as well as they should have been. Aethra hoped that by extending her knowledge through exploring other planets other than Kathenspiel, maybe she would find the missing piece to this issue. Maybe other planets held what Kathenspiel didn’t; a direct connection to end the curse of her race and finally allow Aethra to conjure magic as her people originally did. Now, don’t get the wrong impression, Bloodraven’s society and people were doing perfectly fine with Chemistry and potion making and other sorts of alchemy. However, she knew deep down it was nothing like harnessing true magic. All she had to do, as leader and commander of the Bloodraven’s and this future mission, was recruit a handful or so of members that would be willing to stop their lives and discover other types of life. The interstellar expedition would allow knowledge to be gained and resources to be cultivated alongside mapping other planets in the solar system. They would become more advanced, more resourceful, extremely diverse, gain intelligence, and of course the chance to succeed in a quest that would gain them a thrill and glory. If Aethra figured out how to use pure magic along the way, well, who was she to complain? Perhaps sitting locked in her chambers all day was not helping her to get a head start on this mission, nor helping her feel better about it whatsoever. With a stretch that made her joints groan from sitting for hours, Aethra pushed her seat back and let out another sigh. Her purse tied at her waist jingled heavily with gold coins, encouraging her to visit the local tavern where she would be able to gain a clearer head from all the smoke of potions. Her tall silhouette made its way towards the hand carved and beautiful ornamental mirror that hung near her bed set. Staring at herself in the mirror, Aethra began to comb out her smoky blonde hair, her burning amber eyes stared back at herself before she turned away and began to dress to leave towards the local taverns, hopefully busier at this time of day. Aethra’s appearance always turned heads. She seemed dress for balls and fancy dinners rather than for a mission or going to a dirty old tavern while the sun was still going down. The rare ruby at the hilt of her weapon belt around her waist gleamed in the darkness as she made her way down to the bar before seating herself near some shady looking men. “Any news on that mission, Epoa?” The barman teased, using her nickname that she preferred in public while cleaning some dust covered goblets. She shook her head a bit while he passed over her favorite drink, a bit stronger than usual this time. Straightening up a bit, she took a large gulp and let out a satisfied sigh. “I only need eight or so members,” She began, her soft lips pouting out in frustration as the barman just gazed on with an amused smirk on his face. “What kind of mission is this, to need that many members? Doesn’t sound normal,” a nearby customer chimed in, her face dark and her hair tangled. Typical, only the lowly drunks of Kathenspiel are interested in her mission, just her luck. “It’s a very advanced mission, only for those who are willing to spend a large portion of their lives doing it. We would explore the vast galaxy and stars in hopes of finding planets just as beautiful, and diverse as the one we reside in—" A rugged looking man with scars on nearly every inch of his face appeared near Aethra, slamming his mug down and causing her to glare at him a bit from being interrupted. He grinned widely at her, his golden teeth gleaming down as he let out a belch before speaking. “I think this type of mission includes monsters, and lots of death and gore?” He inquired, a bit eagerly as he picked at his teeth. “It would be lightly armed, our mission is to explore, observe, and colonize in order to gain things to advance ourselves as well as discover things. We are not going to murder or harm the creatures on these planets unless it is absolutely necessary,” Aethra answered, staying calm as she realized most of the tavern was either near her or listening in at this point. She straightened up a bit more, her weapon belt gleaming in the face of the dark customers that surrounded her, the tavern’s attention completely on Aethra. This was her chance. “If anyone is interested in joining this mission, I can guarantee that they will be rewarded with glory, pride, knowledge, and experiencing something people can only dream about. In return for that however, you have to give up much of your years and skills for this to be successful.” She explained, her eyes appearing more fiery than usual and gaining the full and undivided attention of those surrounding her. After a slight pause and light clinking of beer mugs and goblets, Epoa watched before her eyes as nine members of the tavern stood before her, ready to partake in the mission. Surprised and holding in her joy to remain professional, she led the dark, dirty, scarred and frightening looking tavern members outside for recruitment. The night was murky and it was very late out, much colder than when she left her home. “I must warn you all however, there is a chance that we will not return to Kathenspiel, meaning you might have to spend the remainder of your lives in a new and uncharted planet, which we would at least be equipped for,” Bloodraven warned, trying to sound as official as possible hoping that none of them would scamper away. No one moved from their spots, a few members fidgeted. Realizing that by opening her mind to people that were deemed ‘lower’ than her, she was capable of gaining recruitment members within minutes of explaining the basic mission ideas. Pushing her blonde hair out of her eyes, Epoa Bloodraven peered at her future crew members. None of them seemed very experienced or well-off whatsoever, but whom else would be willing to spend their lives working like this? She held out a parchment and quill and watched as each member scribbled their names onto it, filling it out quickly and then leaving on to their separate ways once Aethra had enough information to contact them. With a smile that didn’t even begin to give away how truly excited she felt, she nodded and turned on her way back to her large home. Her boots clicked loudly with each fast step until she found her way into her room and locked the door behind her. Her hair a bit frazzled from how excitedly she had run off to home, the list of recruitment members clenched tightly in her sweaty palms. Aethra Bloodraven was more excited than she had ever been in years now. The ship that would take them all was prepared; she could take them all whenever she chose to now. A new adventure, a new chase, and a new crew member that each seemed to bring something unique and almost irreplaceable to the table was all that she could have asked for. Glancing at her table full of torn up parchment and broken potion bottles, Aethra truly felt like this was the one mission that could not fail. She would make sure of it. The next morning Aethra woke up with the sun peering through her curtains, making her eyes squint as she sat up and stretched out her sleep encrusted bones. Today was the day. With a jolt of excited adrenaline, she threw her sheets aside and began to comb out her hair and quickly attach on her weapon belt, looking as refined as ever. She had to get to the space station as soon as possible; she could not show up late on the day of boarding especially if she wanted to make a good impression to her new crew members. Hopefully they were as excited and prepared as she was. The station was a short walk from her large home, which did not help to give her time in order to ease her nerves. She had to look professional and at ease if she expected anybody to take her seriously and this mission even more so. Adjusting her weapon belt, Aethra pushed open the space station’s large front doors, gazing into the sudden bright light before she saw all of her crew members sitting and waiting for her in their uniforms already. Clearing her throat in surprise, she took a deep breath and began, “Today is the day my crew members. We will make our way into the ship, fly out of Kathenspiel and spend a dozen or so days charting what we pass before landing on the first available planet nearest to our own. I hope you have prepared and set your minds to this as much as I have. Otherwise you will only waste space.” The crew members began to murmur amongst themselves, a few fidgeting a lot more than when she had last seen them, looking unsure of themselves. Before anyone could say or do anything, the crew ship arrived in the open field near them. The ship was gigantic, almost bigger than any of them had imagined it would be. A few of the crew members jaws dropped open upon the arrival of it, the steam flowing out of it as its engines whirred loudly. “I am Aethra Bloodraven, I am your commander, leader of this mission, and from this day forth you will consider me the chief of this mission.” Silencing the crew members with a more confident and clear tone, she noticed that they all sat up a bit straighter with this new confidence just as their crew ship’s doors opened. Now all that was left was for the High ranking Military team to make their appearance such as the Core Diversionary Commanders, Admiral, Elite Diversionary Crew and Patrol Diversionary team to join the Crew members she selected for this Expeditionary Mission.