Operation Storm Feedback

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Bastion, Jul 6, 2010.

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  1. Oh... Well don't I feel stupid. I forgot about civilians
     
    #61 *iSaint (01), Jul 7, 2010
  2. Lol it's okay...might want to think things out more next time...
     
    #62 Bastion, Jul 7, 2010
  3. Well you didn't mention it being a town so... Yeah. And wouldn't someone notice the helicopter?
     
    #63 *iSaint (01), Jul 7, 2010
  4. I noted burning cars and collapsed buildings. It's not obvious? And for the chopper, like I sadi before, the NRA were focused on Team Gold. Don't worry, first chapter is suppose to raise questions and keep you hooked, next chapters will explain more and more.
     
    #64 Bastion, Jul 7, 2010
  5. You still have Rika in there, not Osterly who's about to kill me.

    iZ
     
    #65 Nlaz, Jul 7, 2010
  6. Where?
     
    #66 Bastion, Jul 7, 2010
  7. Well you succeed cause I'm hooked and osterly was climbing out that window way to slowly he should have been out by the time mcgreen came in the doorway
     
    #67 *iSaint (01), Jul 7, 2010
  8. Close to the end. Otherwise sweet story. Anyway, atleast the bad guys don't have a cheesy name lol.

    iZaln
     
    #68 Nlaz, Jul 7, 2010
  9. Fixed. And thanks.
     
    #69 Bastion, Jul 7, 2010
  10. Haha I'm tempted to advertise my story here
     
    #70 *-Smallz- (01), Jul 7, 2010
  11. Don't.
     
    #71 Bastion, Jul 7, 2010
  12. **UPDATE** Chapter 2 posted
     
    #72 Bastion, Jul 7, 2010
  13. It's good, but I'm still goin "WTF" in my head.
     
    #73 osterly, Jul 7, 2010
  14. Good story bastion. Makes mine look like shít lol.
     
    #74 *-Smallz- (01), Jul 7, 2010
  15. Plz give more. I wanna hear the end when nuke comes and everyone dies
     
    #75 *-Smallz- (01), Jul 7, 2010
  16. Awww sorry. I ruined the ending
     
    #76 *-Smallz- (01), Jul 7, 2010
  17. Lol lots more is explained in next chap. XD
     
    #77 Bastion, Jul 7, 2010
  18. Hooray! Anyways, are you going to try at least one update a day, or just whenever?
     
    #78 osterly, Jul 7, 2010
  19. I'm going to just do whenever, but at least one a day. I write two chapters ahead of time.
     
    #79 Bastion, Jul 7, 2010
  20. I'm still not in the story, awww
     
    #80 Godsninja13, Jul 7, 2010
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