LoKaW Feedback - Both Versions

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by cheesemuffin, Dec 27, 2011.

  1. Smighter. There is a sequel.
    In fact, I'm writing the signal in about half an hour
     
  2. I'm late but I finally finished reading it. Pretty good cheese, maybe a little lacking in flow? Idk i think it's missing something but I can't quite put a finger on it. Anyway great job!
     
  3. I love how cheese shows the mods. =P
     
  4. If you do it right, people won't know what you did wrong. So, Stora... I'm gonna go ahead and assume I did nothing wrong, okay?
     
  5. I've been so busy lately, I've only just begun writing again... I wonder how interesting the story would become if Feather was secretly schizophrenic..
     
  6. You don't just... Say what you're adding!
    You have to reveal it once its been put in!
     
  7. Oh... Well I'm not sure how I would incorporate that into the story anyway, so..