Anybody want to hear a joke about a piece of pizza ??? Ahhh nvm don't worry about it , it's too cheesy anyways
I went to the doctor and told him I couldn't get the songs "Delilah" and "The Green Green Grass of Home" out of my head. He told me there was nothing to worry about, it's just Tom Jones Syndrome. I asked if it was common. He replied, well, it's not unusual. Edited to change a song name that was censored.
British man, Irish man, & Scottish man are sitting at a bar flies land in there drinks... British man refuses to drink it and orders another. Irish man shrugs and blows it away along with extra froth and continues drinking. Scottish man gently picks the fly up by its wings and proceeds to hold it over his glass and says.. "Go on!" "Spit it oot you wee little bàstard!" (Only bypassed for sake of the joke as it was told exactly like that to me)
A blonde walks into a best buy type of store and finds a salesman. Blonde: sir I'd like to buy this TV. Salesman: ma'am, we don't sale to blondes here. Baffled the lady goes home and decides she won't be treated this way and will buy that TV. So dyes her hair red and figures she'll be in an out with a new TV, no problem. She arrives at the store and finds the salesman and states "sir, I'd like to purchase this TV". Salesman: ma'am, we don't sale to blondes. In disbelief she storms out at heads straight home and dyes her hair jet black, eye brows too, just in case. Looking in the mirror she tells herself "there's no way they can possibly know I'm a blonde now, hmph" and heads back to the store. Lady: salesman! I am here to buy this TV. Salesman: ma'am, I'm sorry but like I said, we don't sale to blondes. Lady: what makes you think I'm a blonde!? Salesman: because that's not a TV. It's a microwave.