The female name I have the male is very dark and sinister a sort of unwanted hero but someone that cares for people alot and is willing to risk his life
Hmm... Not bad. I like it. If you aren't fully satisfie with though, change it because once you get going, it sucks. You want to kill them off.
My first snippet Now if you are reading this because you want to feel like a superhero and experience a better world shut this now, this is the story of me and my sister Alaina. Oh yes we haven't been properly introduced I'm Nico I grew up on the east-side of manhattan, Houston street to be exact, with my sister Alaina. Thing is, we are not exactly like normal kids you see we never really knew our dad until he turned up on our doorstep the other day. And that's where we begin so let's go.
This is my next chapter, checked it on word so im gonna post it on my story thread. If you see any mistakes that I missed, please tell me and I will correct it. Chapter 3 After that ominous pronouncement, she could do nothing but stand in front of him, her face frozen in surprise. Nothing surprised her much anymore; she thought she had seen it all but apparently she hadn’t. “But how can they hope to convert me?” She said. She had control of her facial muscles once again, but the shock still colored her voice. “I have no soul, they have nothing to work with!” But inside her mind, her doubts made themselves known. “Have they come up with new technology? They used to need victims with souls, and no person wanted to part with theirs willingly, not even the hardiest Ma’ Uibo Warrior” she thought frantically to herself “though it was stripped from me at a young age, I was born with one… Maybe they can bring it back” The thought filled her with dread. A soul makes a person vulnerable, but without one, many people would perish. Starting around 10-12, people start storing emotions or states of the mind in them such as love, kindness, self preservation, free will and even can store memories. If they are stripped from them they lose whatever they stored which is why the loss of a soul can make you crazy, mindless, evil, and the list goes on. If it’s taken from you at a young age, it has no effect whatsoever except the fact that it is extremely painful. “The Ma’Uibo have figured out a way to store the souls and completely control a person with them, which is why they are under attack of course. Maybe the Shnedae have figured a way to bring souls back.” She said aloud. “Whether that’s true or not it’s irrelevant.” “Oh of course it’s irrelevant I have a bunch of Domaen damned, shining gold Shnedae bastards (One of them literally so) on my tail and I’m supposed to sit here like a good little girl and eat my vegetables when I could be kidnapped and possibly converted into a shiny ornamental ****!” “Do you want a mission or not!” “Yes I do” “Then sit down and shut up!” the lord roared, black eyes flashing in real anger at her for the first time that day. She mock cowered before him, her silver eyes flashing mischievously “Fine tell me my, oh so important mission.” “I’m warning you, it’s probably the most important thing you will ever do.” He warned, dead serious. “You must infiltrate the city of Irescetza. They are having a war rally. I need you to interrupt that and make an impression. Scare them, make them fear us, you’re good at that. Most importantly don’t get captured!” “Why is this city so important compared to the others.” “Even though you can tear through Sisdiel armor like its paper, not all of our forces can do that. Should Irescetza join the war, they will be able to quadruple the amount of armor they produce, Irescetza controls most of it.” “So in other words if I fail to scare them we all die?” “No they’re probably going to war regardless of what we do. This is just a last ditch effort.” “Oookay?” Velene kept her face carefully blank as she carefully looked him over. She was rarely sent on last ditch attempts, she was far too valuable as a fighter for them to waste her talents like that. “I wonder what he’s hiding from me…” She thought grimly. Rionaquan stared her straight in the face, his expression as devoid of emotion as hers. “You are dismissed. Get some sleep, you are leaving tomorrow.” With a low bow and and an “As you wish Milord.” she turned on her heel and strode out