Moose trudged down the mountain soon after me, joining our group. We set off, not knowing where we were going too, without our map. It was not long after, that a group of birds set up a nest in my Gandalf beard, causing me to throw it away. When we reached an outpost, moose informed me that he needed to poop. Hazzy also required alcohol, Daphnia required fresh souls, and D4rk continued whispering precious as he put his finger in and out of the ring. "Friggin weirdo." I muttered. "Precious." He wheezed in return. After moose had used the little mammals room, and Hazzy was pleasantly buzzed, we stocked up on Cheez-It's, and set off towards our camp. As we reached the edge of town, a short, rotund bulldog walked up to us. "Salutations." The Slobbering dolt greeted us. "Hai." I replied. "Can you move?" "Where are you travelers going?" He asked, licking his chops. "To a... Far away place?" I replied. "May I come with?" He asked, applying the puppy dog eyes. "I don't know..." I said, as moose stomped impatiently. "We already have a lovable mascot." "I could Narrate." He suggested. Hazzy, D4rk, and Daphnia jumped on the idea. "Alright, come on." I said, gesturing. The short stubby thing came forth to join us, speaking as he went. "And the group of friends went forth, unto the great unknown. Where will they go next? Who knows?" He said in a singsong voice. "Is he going to do that the whole way?" Hazzy asked. "Yeah." I replied. "(Moose noise)" moose said, angrily. And we began the next part of our journey.
We set out at daybreak, moose trailing behind, kicking at rocks, and chewing on Bulldog. Bulldog narrated the whole thing. Hazzy passed the time draining our beer supply, D4rk looked at scantily clad women in the magazine, and Daphnia sucked out the soul of any innocent passerby. We passed the time with various lengths of small talk. "Zeth?" Hazzy asked, swigging on a beer. "Yeah." I replied, swigging on a beer. "Where are we going anyway?" He asked. "North." I replied, my eyes ahead. "(Moose noise)" moose said. "Precious." D4rk said. "Well this feels like the Oregon trail." Hazzy said. "I feel like we'll all die of dysentery any moment." "Don't be silly." I scoffed. "I don't feel well." Daphnia said shakily. "A Twist in the Plot!" Bulldog said. "Oh ****." I said, turning pale. "Just screwing with you." She laughed, turning away. "(Moose noise)" moose said. "Precious." D4rk said. "Suddenly, our heroes run into trouble!" Bulldog exclaimed. "Will they survive?" "What do you mean?" I asked him. Suddenly, as we rounded a bend in the path, three bandits stood in the way of our path. "Yo." The first said. He was a ogre all wrinkly, and green, and ugly. "Oh crap." Hazzy said, hiding his beer. "Whatcha got there?" The second asked, looking at us. His name was Rick, I could tell by the name tag, saying hello, my name is Rick but with a backwards "R". "Nothing." I replied hastily. "Leave us alone." "Ha." Laughed the third, a smelly guy named Lar "This is the part where we rob you blind." "Moooo." Moose said. "Dammit Moose." I said, "you aren't a cow." "(Moose noise)" he said. "Precious." Said D4rk. I raised my staff in the air, yelling at the top of my lungs, "We, SHALL PASS!!" "Uh... No you won't." Rick said, as they started toward us. "Daphnia, suck their souls out!" I yelled. "They don't have any!" She screamed in distress. "D4rk... Do something!" I yelled. "Do what?" He replied. "Precious is everything." "Oh god." I said, pulling out my 9mm. "Alright back the **** up." "Oh ****." Lar yelled, wiping mud from his mouth. "Hey we were just messing with you." Rick said. "Gruh." Ogre said. They retreated in the opposite direction. "The leader backs down the bandits with an amazing show of bad assery." Bulldog said. We continued down the path. "Bad ass!" Hazzy said. "(Moose noise)" moose said. "And now they continue upon their journey, nearing their destination with every step!" Bulldog narrated.
I fin this thread becoming such as flaming of other players and should be locked under a breach of the RoC
It's too late you used your story to insinuate that Larry troll and myself are certain ways. In which you have zero knowledge. That is an insult and quite a poor attempt of flaming. You should remove it or request a lock as you have broken the RoC
It was for comedic value. I didn't slander you. And you have been refusing to leave me alone all day.