A Raven Among the Doves: Feedback

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by *iPimella (01), Apr 13, 2011.

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  1. Smackdown time!

    Iiiin this corner returning from his long vacation and his attempted rehab for KaWcaine... I ZAAAALN


    And in this corner, Mistress Lazy, queen of the drowsy... IIIIITS IRIIIIIN
     
    #101 *iPimella (01), Jun 3, 2011
  2. No, no smack downs! I am a pacifist. A pacifist who plays war games and writes war related stories...but a pacifist none the less.
     
    #102 *Irin (01), Jun 3, 2011
  3. Lies. Irin is very violent. Probably one of the most violent people I know.

    iZaln
     
    #103 Nlaz, Jun 3, 2011
  4. What! No, I'd never...so...maybe I have some anger issues...but...okay, yeah, I can get violent sometimes....
     
    #104 *Irin (01), Jun 3, 2011
  5. Sometimes? Honey, I'm pretty sure it's more like usually lol.

    iZaln
     
    #105 Nlaz, Jun 3, 2011
  6. 
     
    #106 *iPimella (01), Jun 3, 2011
  7. I'm shocked!
     
    #107 FeatherHunter, Jun 3, 2011
  8. What's wrong lol?

    iZaln
     
    #108 Nlaz, Jun 3, 2011
  9. I'm still expecting a prologue zaln
     
    #109 FeatherHunter, Jun 3, 2011
  10. 

    MWA HA HA HA

    downright evil right?
     
    #110 Empress_of_Shadows, Jun 3, 2011
  11. Nice, Mystique! At first I thought it was getting a bit repetitive, but then I realized it was a suspense builder. Greed job! Moar soon!
     
    #111 *Irin (01), Jun 4, 2011
  12. Greed job? I beg to differ. Lol someone's very into the vices =O

    I like how you introduced the characters, nice and easy way. And Anala's sense of... Romance leaves a bit to be wondered. Was she into Zac, her last long-time friend? Or is there someone else? (Of course it's later in the story dont tell me.) And two Alexes? haha.

    iZaln
     
    #112 Nlaz, Jun 4, 2011
  13. Alex squared?
    Lol!
     
    #113 FeatherHunter, Jun 4, 2011
  14. You're keeping me on edge! I can't wait to see what happens next!
     
    #114 Storallelite, Jun 4, 2011
  15. @Stora
    She's gonna push you off the edge :0

    iZ
     
    #115 Nlaz, Jun 4, 2011
  16. Mystique isn't that mean!...Right?...
     
    #116 Storallelite, Jun 4, 2011
  17. Don't worry, I have a video camera. Just stay that the edge. I'll catch footage of when she pushes u and upload it to YouTube, so on your way down, you pull out ur iPod and watch. See? All happy-do 

    iZaln
     
    #117 Nlaz, Jun 4, 2011
  18. Um I think I'll be too busy screaming... Couldn't you help me or something? Like get a net?
     
    #118 Storallelite, Jun 4, 2011
  19. Mmm... How about a ginormous moon walk thingy?! U can bounce!

    iZ
     
    #119 Nlaz, Jun 4, 2011
  20. Uh sure, better than crashing
     
    #120 Storallelite, Jun 4, 2011
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