I run to my room and lock the door and breathe heavily. I'm scared out of my mind and lay on my bed and close my eyes shut tightly and try to hold in the tears. What if he's mad at me? What if he thought that I was the reason for his death? I heard the door open and close I think the priest left. I feel the weight slowly lift off me. I see the same shadow again and start to walk toward it. "Declan? Is this really you?" I wait for a response for several minutes, nothing. I lay back down and I soon find my self asleep, it's the same dream I had when the priest was here, I'm laying in his arms watching the snow fall from te blazing hot sun than we says, "I really am here, this is me." than I smiled and he wrapped his arms tightly around me and started to twiddle his fingers in my hair. I woke up in the morning the next day, noticesing oh my gosh he really is here.
I sit there and think about how this could all be possible, until I heard the doorbell ring. I ran down stairs and unlocked the door, I saw Lucas standing there with flowers. "May I come in?" he asked I waved my arm toward me to signal him to come in. He walked in and kissed my forehead. "Your mother is worried sick. Did you know she called me to tell me to come visit you today?" he said leaning his head on mine. "No, but I knew se fell asleep in my room last night, she must have been really worried." I said looking at the flowers he brought. "She said you like passed out or somthing and when you woke up you screamed Declan was back, can we talk about this?" she said handing me the flowers after he said that than he told me that they were for me. I told him thank you and we sat on the couch. I layed my head on his shoulder and I told him all about how I see his shadow and how he is back for some reason that I don't know. "Please don't break up with me if he really is back." he said kind of depressed. "I wouldn't do that." I said lieing to him I felt bad to just think about that. I just loved Declan much more, what we had was so speacial, he was my world and he would never hurt me. We dated for two years and never had a single fight, it was love and I knew it.
He got a text from his mother soon later. He looked at it with a little smiles on his face. "My father, he is back from afganastan. Do you want to come say hello with me?" he asked me hopfully. I never met his father, Lucas told me all about him and I could tell that the two were very close. I didn't want to be rude or anything buy I really didn't want to go. "How about another time, I don't feel very well. You know, about Declan." I said not just making up an excuse. I really didn't feel well at all. "Okay, I'll stay here with you then." he said leaning his head down on mine. "No, go I insist. You never see him and I know that you two are very close." I said lifting my head up to look at him. "Are you sure?" he asked looking back to me. "Possitive." I said smiling at him. "Well, okay. Please get better soon, I'll be praying for you." he whispered and kissed my forehead than walked down the hallway. I soon heard the door shut. I layed my head back on the couch and closed my eyes. "Declan, why in hell did you dicide to just go in me." I said annoyed. I felt horrible, I knew he was here. This isn't the kind of stomache flu or fever or somthing like that. It was like I could feel my heart sizzle and heat up inside. I hated it. I turned on the television to get my mind of things. I watched some old cartoon I used to watch every morning, I remember waking up to strawberry warm milk and sitting on the couch watching cartoons with my blankie when I was seven. Those were the care free days when I didn't have to give a crap about boys or anything. I wish I could turn back the clock and be seven again. Mom soon woke up after I watched a couple of cartoons. "Good morning sweetie. Are you feeling okay? Does anything hurt?" she said hugging me. "Mom, I feel fine. I feel warm, that's all." I said a suring her that I was fine. "Is there anything I can do for you?" she asked holding my hands tightly. "Can I have warm strawberry milk? Like when I was seven?" I asked hopfully. She smiled and said, "Sure thing."