There were once 12 paldains that lived happily together. One day though, one of them,nemises, wanted all the other paldains power. He split the 11 paldains and took their power. According to legend every 130 years the 11 paldains come together and fight nemisis putting their faith to one paldain. This is the introduction to my story ill be back tommrow with the first chapter.
Not much of an intro... Things to Remember: Grammar! Spelling! Details! Body! So please, include these, even a little bit, because your intro didn't mirror that a bit. I was immediately disinterested because there was nothing specific, and it looked as if a 10 year old had crafted it. I hope Chapter 1 improves.
Didn't he say something about "tomorrow?" Been more than one day, I'm actually interested to see if Chapter 1 is better.