I know i just started Sticky, but to enforce the rules, all feedback, ratings and tips please be posted here! <><>Kiki<><>
>^.^< very nice ... Cute lil sticky Adjectives = descriptive words E.g. Fuzzy, cute, purple, feisty Tigaz favorite types of words are adjective!
Excellent descriptive words, but a not so excellent USE of them . They words themselves were great however an entire chapter of descriptive words is way too much for the story to flow. Try sneaking them in like "Sticky yelped as she dove into the brush after the rabbit, her big brown eyes sparkling with anticipation. She walked out again proudly displaying her catch, her fluffy white tail wagging back and forth in excitement" as opposed to "she has deep brown eyes and white fur and is oh so fluffy!" Also it is never a good idea to start a story with "hi my name is ____ and this is what I'm doing" Try and start off with an action sequence, and slowly reveal what is happening. Also it might have been a better idea to write in 3rd person, but again it's your story. Should you have any issues with anything i say wall me thank you for reading this and not just ignoring it. Keep up the effort and above all keep writing because practice makes perfect!
Thanx sooo much GlooMi! Now that i have an idea of what i did, i understand how i could fix it. Thanx all