Seal Competitions #2

Discussion in 'Activities' started by _ZE_FireKTN_MP_, Sep 8, 2017.

  1. When he pulls it out and you're wondering if you can handle it
  2. Welp that's the end of the 1st competition.

    The winner will be announced at midnight est.

    Thank you to everyone who participated. :geek:
  3. About that time-

    Thanks again to everyone who participated in the first competition of this series, and good luck to everyone in the next round. :)
  4. Bump for start of competition #2
  5. How does Harry Potter get down a hill?

    He runs.

    JK Rowling.
  6. A man walks into a bar and says, “Give me a beer before the problems start!”

    He drinks the beer and then orders another saying, “Give me a beer before the problems start!”

    The bartender looks confused but gives him another beer.

    This goes on for a while, and after the fifth beer the bartender is totally confused and asks the man, "When are you going to pay for these beers?"

    The man answers, "Now the problems start!"
  7. What's the difference between Florida and the lost city of Atlantis?

    About 3 days.
  8. I opened a company selling landmines disguised as prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof.
  9. What starts with 'M' and ends in 'arriage' and is a mans favourite thing?
    This joke never gets old, just like the baby.
  10. I saw my sister pleasuring herself with a carrot.
    I said, 'dam i was gonna eat that, now its just gonna taste like carrot!'.
  11. Ok, so this farmer goes out looking to buy a stud rooster. After days of searching he comes across a man selling roosters & hens on the side of the road.

    He pulls up & tells the man exactly what he's looking for & the man smiles and motions for him to come in closer.

    Upon doing this, he whispers the name El Diablo in the farmers ear.

    Being a bit confused the farmer asks him to explain. So the man tells him "This rooster will impregnate every hen you have on the farm by himself! He's unnatural! For 200$ he can be yours!!

    So the farmer thinks it over & agrees. As he is leaving the man yells "Wait! You haft to make him rest!!! He will not stop until he dies!" The farmer laughs & goes home & sets him loose.

    Boy, all you see is a flury of feathers, El Diablo was on this job like white on rice!

    So the farmer goes & lays down for a nap. About two hours later he wakes up & walks out side to see all the hens are laid over panting, his cows are looking around confused & his poor dogs under the porch whimpering!!!

    Then he see's El Diablo, laid out in the road dead.... He runs over there cursing him for all he's worth!!! "You stupid rooster!!! I payed 200$ for you!!! Why couldn't you just take a damn break!?"

    El Diablo opens one eye looks at him and whispers "Shut up you old fool... The buzzards are coming in !!!!"

  12. What do a walrus and Tupperware have in common??

    ...THEY BOTH LIKE A TIGHT SEAL (of the damned)!!!!

    Corny but effective.
  13. What do you wall people who dont dart in public?

    Private Tutors
  14. A girl walks into a supermarket. She picks up a banana, a can of soup, and a loaf of bread. She then walks up to the cash register to pay.
    The cashier looks at her and the items she has and says, "I can tell you're single."
    She smiles and responds, "How do you know that?"
    He says, "Because you're ugly."
  15. funny or too far? Idek :lol:
  16. What is the difference between sihk and a Muslim?

    One works at 7/11 the other caused 9/11
  17. *wiggles*
  18. One time , my mom bought this dog house and I wonder if she was getting me a puppy. Nope she said if I want a dog I should act like one and move into the dog house...
    Now I got fleas 
  19. That one is dumb.... Disqualify that dood for such a lme joke.
  20. Banned for claiming to be a dog when you're a bobcat ..oh wait wrong thread :/