So I have class in approximately 2 hours and need some help finishing up a poem I've written. The requirements were to use caesura, heavy alliteration, and kennings. Here's what I've managed to write.... I, am Liam, lord of the lords. I have conquered castles and slain all who have seeked to sabotage me Out of my blood, bravery, and brewing thirst for power I have formed a dynasty where, not even those condemned to the land of suffering could overthrow. High and tall I sat upon my throbbing throne, still thirsty for more of the precious power that I already obtained. Licking my lips from the beauty of the destruction and disorder I could create, I began to plot my next victim. Can someone plz critique this, tell me what to fix/do better and possibly help me add to this since it's relatively short. Thanks
End it with There's a Lady that's sure All that glitters is gold And she's buy the stairway to heaven
Song lyrics. Could get into trouble there. And your throne was throbbing ? I'd rethink that one. But too late to help with the two hours by time stamp sorry. Bluff out a bit more and put emphasis on the characters motivation. What drove him to seek power. What event enraged him, was he enraged, was he fuelled by passion. A poem is more about emotion than a story. Think of it as a spoken song. It should be designed to get the person hearing it to feel something for the character. It should make us aware of their situation. And the true test of whether your poem is successful. Can you remember it without reading it. It doesn't have to be absurdly long. It just has to paint a picture in the mind. And make a person pause and consider. To feel for a moment, or longer. If you remember your own poem, if others do. Then you have made them and yourself think about it. Job done. Good start and plenty to build on. Just write from the heart
can a mod plz lock this thread so these fail trolls can get off my thread. Btw I'd like to see what u can write in 5 mins️