Make Love Not War, new eb help

Discussion in 'Strategy' started by chuckfreknnorris, Sep 19, 2013.

  1. I am locked in an epic battle that I can not win. I guess I should start this tale from the beginning. My name is chuckfreknnorris and I have been training for this battle since the day I was born 27 years ago. I have been a humble squire all my life learning by watching and listening to stories of others who have been in battles. One month ago I heard the seductive voice of a siren named My Girlfriend. I was not aware her scouts had penetrated my defenses and her spies assassinated all my troops til I was DTW. She had farmed me long enough and I could take no more. So I initiated the epic battle, xtaled, put on my armor, grabbed my sword and lunged at the beast. Thus, I began my VERY FIRST EB. I was nervous and had unstable footing, and I recalled stories from other knights that this eb usually only last 30 seconds. I skimmed my troops and spies hoping for a larger bonus in the end. 5 mins in and I knocked down her first health bar and watched her tremble as I cast mind scream on her. 15 mins in she rides pin to a 3-0 victory, as her first health bar regenerated every 5 min using every mind scream I had. Still at 100% troops and spies and having lost my very first epic battle, I was forced to whack away at quest til I exhausted all my troops. I have repeated this epic battle two more times to no avail. I even changed my equipment by removing my armor to allow for increased control and handling of my sword, but nothing works. I have checked wulf's epic battle guide but there is no info on what to do. So I ask you, the KAW community, what do I do? Tear down everything and become a gh, upgrade to lv 2 on hf, build more towers...?

    Hit by mist of confusion
    Chuckfreknnorris
     
  2. Wtf? Is this appropriate for 9 game? Or am I reading the inuendos wrong?
     
  3. This is about the difficulties of getting a seal of the damned. Not sure what you are talking about.
     
  4. I make love () AND war all the time. Together.
     
  5. ................................................................... ah..
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    What???????

    I suggest you reset....
     
  6. You failed to unload troops on your gf so had to hit quests? Poor effort. Hilarious post though
     
  7. What the hell did I just read. Am so confused
     
  8. I too am confused...
     
  9. Nonsensical but funny :lol:
     
  10. It's hilarious how you think we're that stupid when your the idiotic king.