Feed Back for Revenge

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by lIlIlIlI-CoS-NiTRO-IlIlIlIl, Jul 23, 2012.

  1. Yep, feedback thread for my story. I came back here after realizing that I didn't want to do downfall of darkness, since some character details wouldn't fit.

    So yeah... Post feedback, constructive criticism.
     
  2. I suggest you change the name.
    Too many things are called revenge.
    And the story so far is pretty typical but meh, it's ok.
     
  3. I'm on an iPod, and account is locked to I device, do I can't.
     
  4. Oh gosh, looking further into the story, I could've called it "Nameless"
     
  5. This chapter has parts of 3 different places.


    The five dashes indicate that the next part takes place somewhere else.
     
  6. Some parts stolen from dragon ball z Kai abridged