Betrayed FEEDBACK

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by -Xx-Last-Of-The-Lost-xX-, Aug 1, 2012.

  1. Feedback for Betrayed!
     
  2. Your story is kind of...vague. You don't write details that could otherwise explain the story. You keep the story from becoming boring, but at the same time I can't tell what happened during the first chapter besides someone swearing outside a gate, people dying, and then another person laughing about it.

    So...um...think about that.
     
  3. The "other person" is the same cloaked guy outside.
     
  4. Well see you just explained it there.