bed time stories!

Well once in a land called palringo. There was a place called [pound of flesh] where everyone was ******* crazy. People were scared and ran from this room. One of the main attractions was the bar train. Which was conducted by SEVEN llamas in hats. Well, once in this magical land. A wizard with unknown intentions joined. That wizard was a strange man named Carlosasa, who had a big chewy beef with the llamas in hats.
One day Carlosasa plotted to finally get revenge on the llamas for what they had done to his watermelon stand; they blew it up. Anyway, the bar train was only 10 minutes away from arriving at their destination when the evil wizard struck. He set explosives on the track so he could derail the train, injuring the llamas, and allowing him to cut off their faces. Unfortunately there was a little squirrel that decided to **** around and rub its nuts all over the ******* bomb and its ******* nuts exploded all over the ******* track and ****** all the wizards ******* **** up!! The llamas smelt the burnt nuts and immediately stopped the train. They had smelled the scent before when a crazy squirrel rubbed its nuts on an explosive that was set by their nemesis so long ago. They decided it would be best to go on foot from there and track down where the smell came from. Soon they discovered a dead squirrel and nuts EVERYWHERE AND I MEAN ******* EVERYWHERE! But... The dumbass magician was always stupid and forgot to bring the cable that sent the signal to detonate the bombs with him. They followed it and found his tracks, tracing it back to a ****** up cabin in the woods....
The llamas cornered the house, it was dead silent. The SEVEN llamas in hats knew he was in there. They could smell the burnt nuts all over the place (burnt nuts have a very distinct smell). Roger, the eldest llama approached the deteriorating door and knocked 3 times. Suddenly, a giant tiger jumped out from behind the door and ate Roger like he was a tiny cupcake and ran off into the woods quicker than they had time to react.
Next, the second born, William Smitch approached the door, grabbed the handle, and twisted it. Little did he know that there were five billion volts running through that door nob! Promptly after touching it he exploded into ash! there were 5 left...
Then, Hooraybies, the third born, decided he had had enough of these silly shenanigans! He ran up to the porch of the house and kicked in the window with his feet like a donkey. Only moments lasted before he realized what was happening. The glass came to life and surrounded him, floating in the air. They sliced him up until he was half dead. And once he decided that he needed to leave the glass denied him. The sharp pieces grabbed him by his legs and pulled him back towards the porch. They flipped him over onto his stomach and cut the back of his pants open. He couldn't take what happened next he lost his will to live, and died right there, bleeding from every part of his body except for his cornea of course.
Finally, the fourth eldest llama name tailaquisha (tie-luh-quee-shuh) walked a few steps toward the house and pulled out a rocket launcher. Tailaquisha had chosen that the best way to get revenge was to kill the malicious wizard with a single, large explosion. She prepared the rocket launcher and aimed it to fire. Suddenly, the house came to life, stood up, and charged at the llamas! It trampled Tailaquisha and she was left as a llama pancake.
With the house gone and the remaining land it stood on empty, the wizard was left defenseless. He stood there, naked, wearing nothing but an animal fur scarf. The 3 remaining llamas, the youngest, became enraged at the disgusting wrinkly body of the wizard and pulled out their weapons. One had a switch blade, one had a baseball bat, and one had a pair of rusty scissors. They walked slowly and ominously towards the wizard as he became red and blue with embarrassment and fear.
But, there was another who also had a grudge against the wizard. A magical squirrel who the wizard had casted an immortality spell on 8 years ago. He had to watch his family and friends die. With the immortality spell came other powers. The squirrel could turn into a Christmas poo and increase his mass 1,300 fold!!! So, back to the story. There was another that had a grudge on the stupid wizard and he was a squirrel named rapture who like rubbing his nuts on explosives. Just as the living llamas were closing in to cut off the wizards face and beat him senselessly a giant squirrel ran out from behind a tree and stomped on the wizard with its ginormous foot! The wizards body went splash! crack! splat! Body parts and blood went flying everywhere and I mean ******* everywhere! His shriveled ***** flew up and slapped each of the llamas right in the face. Their death debt was settled but they weren't even yet. They went up to the gory dismembered body of the mage and pulled out their weapons. They cut off the old wrinkly face from the skin it hung from, and they left. Never returning to the place they dare not mention.

An original story of the land that is PoF, by lucifer and keo.

 

And that is not what I thought was on my copy paste.