Another fail poem by FA

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Imsoclever, Feb 6, 2013.

  1. In the light there is dark
    In the dark there are people
    In the dark of the light are there people who do not know
    In the light are the people who do know
    In the depths of darkness there are those few, those awful few
    Who know, yet choose not to show.



    Trolls, have your say
    Others, say and stay.

    Hurray for my awful poems :mrgreen:
     
  2. It's quite good actually!
     
  3. :shock: For real? Because imo, my poems are pretty bod.
     
  4. 3rd !!!! AMAZING
     
  5. Um it's confusing.
    Does it Have a structure?

    Not raining on your parade but either make it rhyme or don't make it rhyme don't try make some lines and words rhyme but not all

    All or nothing.

    Not a killjoy, just being blunt
     
  6. And replace
    "do not know"
    With
    "don't know"

    It helps the poem flow better :D
     
  7. I like it... Though make it longer. I hate small poems, since they end quickly. It's like... there's four lines, you're just getting warmed up, ready to read more... and then BAM! It ends, right there. Shattering your hopes and dreams. :cry:
     
  8. Wow. You guys found this? :lol: I thought it died.
     
  9. Bro, not all poems have to rhyme, Epic Poems dont