Brand Name Rap Battle

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by AshesOfEden, Apr 25, 2017.

  1. This is the thread where you can exercise your creative lyrics skillz, your prowess of brand names and bling and your inner eThug need to one up the previous person..


    Ofcourse if you are not lyrically inclined (or too lazy to rhyme), then just straight up just one-up it..


    OK.. I'll start it off.. I've set the bar pretty low so that you can one-up easily and we go from there


    Here we go..



    I rock my junk with Hanes
    slather my head with Rogaine


    My Arrow shirt has stains
    Cos the detergent I use says "No Name"


    My Favourite brand is George
    Cos Walmart trends are posh


    I squeeze my legs into GAP
    But they make my ass look Phat


    My Kia won't go up a hill
    But my Chuck Taylor's they will


    I always say a Keystone Light in hand
    Is better than a colt 45 and a Busch


    I get lost cos instead of google maps I use Garmin
    Hey atleast I still wipe my ass with Charmin..




    One up them if you dare!

     
  2. Ashes I will one up you. Just you wait.
     
  3. Oh I'll be waiting Light.. you dollar store raiding, thrift shop diving, HNM binging hipster poseur..
     
  4. Everything I own is Gooci,
    Including my name brand poochie.

    I enjoy drinking some jameson,
    And then I drive my dodge ram half ton.

    Little did Nintendo know,
    Everything they'd do would be for show.

    Columbus records is my jam
    As I watch NBA slam.

    I wake up to lipton ice tea,
    And I finish the day with green giant peas.
     
  5. Alright. Lemme clear my throat.


    I'm coming in the battle cause I got something to say.
    Don't rap against me if yah ain't ready to play.
    I bust in the room cause everybody know my name, if you try to battle me then I'll bring you shame.
    You can't hate the player, just hate the game.
    There's nothing I like better than to roast on you beginners, then set you ablaze like you're sinners.
    Yeah I'm the winner, eating that KFC chicken dinner, smashin' Ashe's lame rhymes with my dollar signs and peace of mind, ain't no compromise when you're coming from behind.

    Dueces.
     
  6. My Name is Dafydd and I'm a Welsh Dude
    I try to be polite but at times can be rude

    I enjoy my beer but when I'm drunk
    I go in WC and can act like a punk

    Mods catch my posts and i end up with a silence
    Which in a way is cool cos it saves a lot of violence

    This is my first attempt at rap and will probably be my last
    It's been a bit of fun but not much of a blast ...drops mic 
     
  7. First.. replying to Ashaya's excellent rap

    Yo Goochi Poochie all ur stuff is fake..
    Real Gucci is pronounced Gussy..
    Like "Yo I gussied up my date"

    My shoes are all Hermes
    none of that Jordan Airness

    *If you don't know how Hermes is pronounced, please stop reading cos the rest won't be funny at all

    I don't buy my shirts at Target
    I get them at Yves Street Lawrence market

    Don't Chanel all your hate on my Boscia
    Just cos I drink Michael Coors on my front Porsche

    Try to run with me but you fall on your knee
    Cos u Cheapass's wearing ripoff Saucony


    So while you go play Tag with ur Heuer
    I'll go play with my Dolls in my Cabana


     
  8. Chooxh Life, Chooxh a job

    Chooxh DIY and wondering who the hell you are on a Sunday morning.

    Chooxh sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing KFC into your mouth.

    Chooxh rotting away at the end of it all, wasting your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, messeded-up brats you have spawned to replace yourself.

    Chooxh your future. Chooxh life . . . But why would I want to do a thing like that? I chose not to chooxhlife: I chose something else.

    And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who needs reasons when you’ve got POPEYE's Chicken



     
  9. My buddy Dafdd.. it takes guts (or being drunk) for a Welsh dude to try rapping..

    But I cannot respond to you cos..

    Your rap has no brands in it!!
     
  10. I don't think you Apple players get the brand premise
    Maybe you just had a little too much damn Guinness

    I will only ever play on a Samsung Galaxy
    An Apple fan is what I don't know how to be

    Kick you in your faces with my brand new Reeboks
    If you ain't got Callaways then get off the blue tee box

    If you don't get off then I'll run you over in my Ford
    I'll use my Makita drill to remove your front door

    I'll go into your kitchen and open your Frigidaire
    Then I'll crack open a Coors Light and have to sip it there

    I'll go to your bedroom where your wife is on the Tempur Pedic
    Of all the different sizes for me a Magnum is needed

    I'll get a Home Depot fire poker really really hot
    And press it on your wife's covered-by-Calvin-Kleins spot

    I am not gonna be sorry that I branded your wifey
    Because a sponsorship will have been handed to me by Nike

    Fite me
     
  11. KoD blamed Trojan
    But really they just don't have sizes that small


    He couldn't even get a ride with Penelope the cat at Six Flags
    Cos he's not 1 feet "tall"


    KoD is really really a liar
    Cos his Samsung phone lit his pants on fire! 


    KoD thinks he knows Victoria's Secret
    But what he thought edible underwear, was really in fact spandex


    Face it KoD, why even go to Home Depot
    When ur house is already on Repo

     
  12. I might not be "big" or be able to shop at WalMart
    But I lost my vcard during the movie Paul Blart

    I may have the same virility as my fixed dog
    But girls still like me cuz I do Skyrim jobs

    And even though I can't afford brand name clothes
    I can't get this Victoria Secret model's damn legs closed

    Why is AshesofEden even actin like they know me?
    I'll leave him as dead as that one clan AoE
     
  13. I would not could not on a boat
    Read any dumb thing you lil truckers wrote

    One fish two fish red fish blue fish
    Its a rap battle yo lets do this

    Three four,open the door
    Need some more rappers to wipe the floor

    Five six yo this slick
    slippin like a snake through stick towers like yeeeeet

    ^ Rekt