[clickbait title]

*disclaimer* this is not a joke *disclaimer*

tl;dr go nuts

[insert basic introduction and greeting here]
"What's up internet', back to you with another topic"


[bring up some controversial topic]
"blah blah blah coke vs pepsi"


[say something controversial about that controversial topic]
"crystal pepsi is better than coke or regular pepsi"


[make the most illogical arguments]
"crystal pepsi is clear so therefore it's like water, so it's like the best"


[thank your nonexistant fans for the 'support']
"thank you for all the support recently i couldn't have done this all without you"


[live the rest of your life drowning in money]


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you're not welcome