So I'm not sure if anyone noticed this, but the iPhone emojis have the poop emoji labelled under "people". Since when is poop a person. Doesn't that make flushing it murder? I don't know guys, what do you think?
If poop is people, then are different poops just different ethnic groups? I believe all poop should be allowed to live free in its natural habitat (underground), and that by moving it to the ocean and land dumps is just well... Stupid. Why would you force such a magnificent creature to live in a place that it is not very comfortable in? I say we stop all sewers from carrying poop into the ocean to carry poop into the ground so that they can make fertilizer babies. Now that raises my next point, will poop get their rights? Is poop a sentient being? Are they self-aware? And should they be allowed to marry hoomans? The answer to all of those is of course, yes. Poop has only been an asset to the community. They have done nothing wrong, well, except not wear deodorant, but we can fix that, to deserve the abuse that they get. Poop has been on this planet for a lot longer than we have, I think it's time that we give it the respect it deserves. Poop is also a very special creature, it has no arms or legs, so it cannot move, it just sits there, waiting, trying to talk to you. Yet, that is another problem with the great lifeform poop, it moves in very slow motion. The poop cannot even leave a noise until you leave the room. Poop does still try to communicate though. They try to communicate through farts, proving they are sentient and self-aware. Now, should poop be allowed to marry hoomans? Yes. If someone is stupid enough to actually do that, yes. You may now kiss the poop. This is definitely not a campaign to get poop out of ocean waters so that we can have a cleaner environment, and please, think of where you leave your poop, one day, a whale may be trying to catch a fish, opening its mouth, then finds that with the fish, he also swallows a giant turd. A giant, stinky, smelly turd. When you're eating food, do you worry about poop being around it? No, you don't, then why make us worry about it? Please, save the whale stomachs, recycle poop correctly.
Well, sometimes making one is like giving birth to a child. I'm due for a burrito baby in about an hour.