I saw a...

I saw a UFO

 

It was as real as my girlfriend

 

It smelled like a muffin

 

And looked like your

 

iPhone

 

that smelt like poop

 

Cunningly disguised as a muffin

 

The end...

 

I saw a naughty video...

 

It stole a cookie from the cookie jar while nobody was looking

 

And gave it to the people of America

 

Who all became the children of jesus obama

 

And burnt in hell for eternity.

The end

 

I saw a man outside my imaginary window

 

And he was caring for 80 baby turtles

 

That were all turned into turtle sammiches

 

I then sent the 80 turtle sammiches to africa

 

Where they became flying death rats

 

And attacked the world and that we fell into being post-appocalyptic

 

Then I woke up because i had poo in my pants