Work in Progress

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by -AppleSauce-, Feb 23, 2015.

  1. Avast! My mates and Kaw Co-workers!

    . Here's a sample piece of my work! Modified from my original Work in progress
    Tale of the Princess's Knight.

    W/o further ado


    The flames surround me as I cradle her in my arms as she dies..no not dying I tell myself over and over again in disbelief, for it to end like this.. When we come so far..

    The tears come and I can't stop them.
    They stream down my soot covered face as I rock back and forth in my fractured armor trying to wake from this twisted reality.

    In agony I scream, in anger, in frustration in hopelessness, cursing the gods upon this gore covered battlefield. Screaming hatred to hell, earth and the heavens above. But to no avail.

    I gaze into her eyes, her bright wonderful eyes. And she's smiling back at me with that sweet yet pure smile. The same that captivated my heart years ago.

    My princess, my lover, my everything..

    She touches my chin, startling me from my thoughts and whispers " it's ok" and for a second.. I dare to believe her.

    But how can it be?! When the person I love is dying in my arms, when that person is you I scream.
    I look to the heavens at the dark clouds above searching for an answer.
    Have I not sacrificed enough! Have I not given soul, blood, and sweat to my duty and this Cause!

    Why is all I can ask... Why? Why have the gods abandoned me in my time of need. My pleas fall upon deaf ears and my tears cloud my vision as I hang my head low.

    She caroused my cheek , her hand cold to the touch, her emerald eyes still sparkling like they did last summers eve.
    "Tell me a story" she says so low I barley her her. I can feel her essence slipping and her breathing becomes shallow.
    " Like the ones when we were kids."
    My head hurts and my arms shake, I brush her hair and hold her tighter. I force a smile with every ounce of will I have and I try to hold back my tears.
    " I'll do you one better I'll tell you a story you wouldn't believe. about an orphan and his emerald princess " my voice sounds foreign to me as If spoken by a stranger."..Once upon a time there was A Beautiful princess and her Gallant Knight...."


    Hope Ya enjoyed, I'll try to constantly post parts of my books or write short stories! So check em out when Ya can mates.
     
  2. Grammar & storytelling in general is really bad. Not trolling... honest opinion.
     
  3. Wtf is this
     
  4. Moved to correct section.
     
  5. If you can't appreciate literature, don't comment. Nice work op :)
     
  6. I can appreciate literature, this is just poorly written literature. If you can't appreciate honesty, don't post on public forums.
     
  7. This is terrible
     
  8. No #420Blazing 420th Forum Post
    SmokeWeedEveryday