I'm still trying to figure out what kind of story this is. Dint get me wrong, it's a good start and a step in the right direction, but there are some issues. The flow is off a bit. Dialogue is rushed. the plotline needs to slow down a bit. u don't have o rush through it
Don't worry, planning on fixing that later on in the story. I need and want the flow a bit off. It starts me in the right direction for the rest of the story.
Besides what Waffle said... It's interesting, although lots of it is worded rather typically. By that, I mean that a lot of it is what you would hear in a stereotypical young adult romance sort of thing. That's just my opinion though. I like less common wordings, but yours are still perfectly fine.
Chapters 3-5 have been added! Hope you guys like them! Also, I want to give credit to I_Got_Da_Swagger for his/her story, which go me thrilled to make this one.
no offense, but its not really original at all. So many stories about teenagers with god-like powers. And so many stories with romance. Also, the dialogue should be improved. It's just not as smooth as a human interaction.
The romance part, almost EVERY book has that, so why not? The dialouge, as I said, is going to be fixed later. Mishaps were either me getting caught up in the story, or for a reason.
Chapter 6 added! Make sure to look at my message! I'll recite it here: "Here's the part in the book to where all flaws will be fixed. I had to give false impressions, but now their true nature will be shown." Be sure to look at Trixie's background! Will be helpful in chapters to come.
Now here's the very ending of the book, and why I named it "Low Tide". "The waves lapping at the shore were the ones of low tide..."
I'm not going to say anything, being on FanFic since just after it was added to Forums, except that you're getting nowhere with chapters shorter than mine.
Now I'm thinking of a book, except not like this one. It's where they're already practicing magic and blah blah blah. I'm making like the book, A Game Of Secrets. (Needs more story added, just saying)