Zelgarad Hospitalized 

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Zelgarad Hospitalized 

Postby -WillyTheDeuce- on Aug 13 2016, 8:46pm

ZELGARAD SEVERELY INJURED IN BUILDING FIRE...

THAT HE CAUSED.





REUTERS: August 13, 2016:

Famed epic battle bad boy Zelgarad The Accursed was severely injured today in a building fire that he himself caused.

According to witnesses, Zelgarad was in the process of pillaging a warehouse full of Amish Chuck Wagons when he sustained 3rd degree burns on his hand and crotch, rendering the EB hero "very upset".

7 News obtained a photo of the occurrence....





As seen above, his scrotal manparts were completely burned off in the incident, and boy oh boy, is Mrs. The Accursed is not happy.

"I've told him several times to leave those Amish Chuck Wagoneers alone, but he never listens. Ever. Now he will need to sit down every time he pees."

7 News tried to reach Mr. Zelgarad for a statement but he declined to comment. Reports of several murdered Amish at the hands of Zelgarad were never reported, because Amish do not believe in telephones, or justice.

Stay tuned for tonight's undercover investigation revealing Jorath caught getting a lappy while still on the clock...





And, now over to Bob with the traffic...
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Re: Zelgarad Hospitalized 

Postby wordwaster on Aug 13 2016, 8:51pm

speaking as someone that lives near the amish; and has no pity for those that inflict injury upon themselves, i'm not terribly upset about any of this.
i am on the forum for my own amusement. any amusement you may experience is purely coincidental.
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Re: Zelgarad Hospitalized 

Postby -WillyTheDeuce- on Aug 13 2016, 9:01pm

I figured this stuff would air until Trump opens his mouth again, and then it would slide into the 6th or 7th page.

Also, before Kasama points out the obvious, this is an old thread that was recreated with an updated date, as to avoid the "necrobump" infraction.

I'm a washed up bum who only recycles my crap threads.



Thanks for reading.
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Re: Zelgarad Hospitalized 

Postby wordwaster on Aug 13 2016, 9:11pm

i am on the forum for my own amusement. any amusement you may experience is purely coincidental.
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Re: Zelgarad Hospitalized 

Postby -WillyTheDeuce- on Aug 13 2016, 9:13pm

Oh, and the Amish can't read this bit.


BECAUSE GOD! HAHAHAHAHAHHA! STUPID RULES!!
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Re: Zelgarad Hospitalized 

Postby Nighthawk_FPBO_1 on Aug 13 2016, 9:25pm

Ur just too funny Willy

Don't stop with the humorous threads
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Re: Zelgarad Hospitalized 

Postby xXP_3Xx_-DotNet-_xXP_3Xx on Aug 13 2016, 9:57pm

Just laughed my ass off well scripted 3/10
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Re: Zelgarad Hospitalized 

Postby Kasama on Aug 14 2016, 12:27am

@Willy
I was going to let it slide but it takes real chutzpah to point out your own unoriginal content.

May the KaW dump pay you well for your can collecting.

Deepest condolences,

Kas
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Re: Zelgarad Hospitalized 

Postby Static on Aug 14 2016, 1:09am

wordwaster wrote:
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Re: Zelgarad Hospitalized 

Postby Pingu on Aug 14 2016, 2:26am

The real sad thing is, Zelgarad's a right hander.

So, now that he's lost use of his left hand, he can't play video games or other ambidextrous whatevs.

He's going to forever have a bored right hand and not be able to do much to do with it anymore...

Oh! Hang on! Jorath's wearing a wedding band! His wife's gonna lawyer up and divorce his ass... Maybe she and Zelgarad can hook up and just cuddle and he can give her all the attention Jorath just couldn't...
Plus, when she needs to feel a woman again, she can always just visit Zuthmerak's brother.
Last edited by Pingu on Aug 14 2016, 9:25am, edited 1 time in total.
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