Toast's Guide to Quests

Update 2016-11-16: fixed some typos. I can't believe nobody has noticed for six years.
Update 2017-03-24: revised the nob drop rate based on current tests.

This is a list of all the quests and all their info.
Nob drop rate: ~0.95%
Crystal drop rate: ~.026%

KEY:
Quest Title
Description
Money Earned
Success Message
Fail Message
Percent Complete per Success
Successes needed to Master
Total quest successes to this point

QUESTS:
#1. Excavate
Excavate a mountain to find rare gems.
Money Earned: $2,400-3,000
Your soldiers found some rare gems and sold them for gold.
Your soldiers were lost in a rock slide and failed to return with any gems.
Percent Per Success: 50%
Success's needed for mastery: 2
2

Bonus: 5k gold

#2. The Search For Treasure
Explore the ancient ruins around your kingdom.
Money Earned:
$ 4,800-6,000
You've discovered some buried treasure.
Your exploration party was overwhelmed by traps and wild animals.
34%
3
5

#3. To Catch a Thief
A thief has stolen secret documents from the town hall. Get them back!
Money Earned:
$10,400-13,000
You caught the thief.
The thief got away.
25%
4
9

Bonus: 13k gold

Next quests unlocked

#4. Attack Bandits
Destroy a bandit camp near your kingdom.
$19,200-24,000
You successfully drove away the bandits.
The bandits were too strong for you to defeat.
34%
3
12

#5. Escort Convoy
Escort a delivery convoy to a neighboring kingdom.
$25,600-32,000
You were rewarded for safe delivery of the goods.
Your convoy was captured on your way to the kingdom.
25%
4
16

#6. Unwelcome Guests
A barbarian scouting party was spotted near your kingdom. Drive them away!
$32,000-40,000
The scouting party was killed.
You were defeated by the scouting party.
20%
5
21

#7. Royal Protection
Escort members of the royal family to a neighboring kingdom.
$38,000-48,000
You were rewarded for safely escorting the royal family.
You were overrun by thieves on the trail and forced to turn back.
20%
5
26

Next quests unlocked

#8. Preventative Measures
Barbarians have been terrorizing your convoys. Take them out!
$44,800-56,000
You killed the thieves.
You were driven away by enemy soldiers.
15%
7
33

Bonus: 56k gold, 1 health crystal

#9. Destroy Trade Route
Destroy the trade route of a neighboring kingdom.
$51,200-64,000
You defeated the enemy soldiers and eliminated the route.
You were driven away by guards.
20%
5
38

#10. Protect Your Land
Prevent barbarians from starting a village in your kingdom.
$57,600-72,000
You drove away their settlement convoy and took all they had.
You were driven away by the settlement convoy.
20%
5
43

#11. Held For Ransom
Kidnap a member of the royal family from one of your rivals and hold them for ransom.
$64,000-80,000
The kidnapping succeeded and the ransom was paid.
You failed to drive the enemies away.
16%
7
50

#12. Sabotage
Seek out barbarian units and sabotage their weapons.
$70,800-88,000
You destroyed the enemy weapons.
You were defeated.
16%
7
57

Bonus: 176k gold, 1 health crystal

#13. To the Rescue
Help out an ally that is under attack.
$76,800-96,000
You helped your ally defeat the enemy and was rewarded.
You were overwhelmed by the attacking forces.
16%
7
64

#14. Attack Convoy
Disrupt the barbarian trade routes running through yor kingdom.
$83,200-104,000
You captured a barbarian convoy.
Your soldiers were killed in the attack.
16%
7
71

#15. Intruders
Hunt down the elf scouts that have been spotted around your kingdom.
$84,600-105,600
The scouting party was killed.
The scouting party got away.
15%
7
78

Bonus: 211,200 gold, 2 health crystals

Next quests unlocked

#16. Rescue the Princess
The princess of an allied kingdom has been captured by the barbarians.
$89,600-112-000
You rescued the princess and were rewarded.
The rescue attempt failed.
16%
7
85

#17. Protect the Convoy
Prevent elf thieves have been stealing your convoys.
$96,000-120,000
Your convoy successfully reaches its destination.
Your convoy was captured by thieves.
16%
7
92

#18. Fighting Back
Search out a barbarian camp and raid it.
$102,400-128,000
You raided the camp and stole their gold.
You were driven away.
15%
7
99

#19. Mind Tricks
Elf wizards have been casting spells on your villagers. Eliminate them!
$108,800-136,000
You defeated the wizards.
The wizards defeated your soldiers.
15%
7
106

Bonus: 272k gold, 2 health crystals

#20. For Revenge
Barbarians attacked some of your villagers. Avenge them by burning theirs.
$115,200-144,000
You plundered a small barbarian village.
The barbarian village drove away your army.
15%
7
113

#21. Deliver to Safety
Protect your convoy from elf archers!
$121,600-152,000
The convoy reached the destination safely.
The convoy was lost.
15%
7
120

#22. Spill Their Blood
Push the barbarians back to where they came from.
$126,720-158,400
You forced the barbarians out of their village.
The barbarian village drove away your army.
13%
8
128

#23. The Hunted
Elf hunters have been killing you livestock. Hunt them back!
$128,000-160,000
You killed the hunters and recovered your livestock.
The hunters got away.
13%
8
136

Bonus: 480k gold, 2 health crystals

Next quests unlocked

#24. Battle at Valhalla
The barbarians have amassed an army and your kingdom's border. Attack them first!
$134,400-168,000
You destroyed the barbarian army and took everything they had.
Their army defeated you.
15%
7
143

#25. Stealing Business
Destroy elf trade routes that are stealing your business.
$140,800-176,000
You destroyed the trade route and got some business back.
The elves drove your forces away.
15%
7
150

#26. Under the Bridge
Your villagers have spotted some goblins under a town bridge. Get rid of them.
$147,200-184,000
Your soldiers killed the goblins.
The goblins got away.
13%
8
158

Bonus: 368k gold, 2 health crystals

#27. Theft
Invade an elf camp and steal their resources.
$153,600-192,000
You successfully invaded an elf camp.
You were defeated by the camp guards.
13%
8
166

#28. Seek and Destroy
Kill the goblins that have been trying to setup camp in your kingdom.
$168,960-211,200
You destroyed the settlement party.
You were driven away by enemy soldiers.
10%
10
176

Bonus: 844,800 gold, 2 health crystals.

Next quests unlocked

#29. Raiding Mission
Raid surrounding elf villages and destroy them.
$211,200-264,400
You destroyed the elf village.
The enemy soldiers defeated your army.
13%
8
184

#30. Hunting Sorcerers
Get rid of the goblin sorcerers casting spells on your villagers.
$253,440-316,800
You killed the sorcerers and freed your villagers from the spell.
You were repelled by the sorcerers.
10%
10
194

#31. Held for Ransom
Capture the elf royal family and hold them for ransom.
$295,680-369,600
You captured the royal family and were paid the ransom.
The royal guards drove away your soldiers.
10%
10
204

Bonus: 1.4m, 3 health crystals

Next quests unlocked

#32. Fighting Giants
Goblin giants have been disrupting your trade routes. Clear the path!
$337,920-422,400
You took down the giants.
The giants crushed your army.
13%
8
212

#33. Preemptive Strike
Destroy the elf army before they get a chance to attack.
$380,160-475,200
You annihilated the elf army, dealing a heavy blow to their kingdom.
The elf army destroyed your attacking forces.
13%
8
220

#34. Hunting Season
Hunt down the monsters that have been stealing your livestock.
$422,400-528,000
You killed the monsters and got your livestock back.
The monsters got away.
10%
10
230

Bonus: 2m, 3 health crystals

#35. Pirate Defense
Pirates have been spotted near your kingdom. Stop them from discovering your villagers.
$464,640-506,880
You stopped the pirates before they found your village.
The pirates killed your soldiers.
10%
10
240

#36. Stealing Gold
Sneak into the goblin village and steal their gold.
$506,880-633,600
You successfully invaded the village.
The guards eliminated your forces.
10%
10
250

Bonus: 3m, 3 health crystals

Next quests unlocked

#37. No Fly Zone
Take down the pirate airships that are trying to land in your kingdom.
$ 549,120-686,400
You brought down a pirate airship.
The airship overwhelmed your soldiers.
10%
10
260

#38. Disruption
Cut off the Goblin King's supply routes.
$552,960-691-200
You eliminated the supply route and stole their convoy.
Your soldiers were defeated.
10%
10
270

#39. For the Love of the Hunt
Attack the pirates that have landed on the shores of your kingdom.
$591,360-739,200
You killed the pirate landing party.
The pirates have killed your soldiers and are invading your kingdom.
10%
10
280

Bonus: 5m

#40. Vengeance
Avenge your villagers and kill the goblins that attacked them.
$633,600-792,000
You hunted down and killed the goblins responsible for the massacre.
The goblins got away.
10%
10
290

#41. Stealing from a Thief
Pirates have stolen from your kingdom. Get your gold back.
$675,840-844,800
You caught the thieves and retrieved the loot.
The pirates drove you away from their stash.
8%
13
303

#42. Pillage and Plunder
Get rid of the goblin villages that have been invading your kingdom.
$718,080-897,600
You burned down the enemy village.
The village defenses stopped your soldiers.
8%
13
316

Bonus: 5.5m

#43. Escort Convoy
Protect your convoy from the pirates staking out your trade route.
$760,320-950,400
You delivered the convoy safely.
The pirates captured your convoy.
8%
13
329

#44. Preemptive Strike
Kill the Goblin King's army before they attack!
$802,560-1,003,200
You decimated the goblin army.
Your surprise attack failed.
7%
15
344

#45. Guard Duty
Stop the pirates that are attacking your villagers.
$829,440-1,036,800
You killed the attacking pirates.
The pirates have defeated your soldiers.
7%
15
359

#46. A Cold Spell
Mystical ice creatures have been spotted in your kingdom. Go investigate.
$844,800-1,056,000
You discovered strange ice creatures and killed them.
The icy creatures attacked and killed your soldiers.
7%
15
374

Bonus: 10m, 3 crystals.

#47. Stealing from a Thief
Raid a pirate airship and steal their stolen loot.
$887,040-1,108,800
You successfully infiltrated a pirate ship and stole their gold.
You were defeated by the pirates.
10%
10
384

#48. Icy Structures
Get rid of the icy structures that are appearing across your land.
$929,280-1,161,600
You destroyed the icy structure and found some treasure.
Your soldiers were repelled by the structure's defenses.
10%
10
394

#49. Sabotage
Find and destroy a pirate airship.
$971,520-1,214,400
You destroyed an airship and stole what was on board.
The airship defenses killed your soldiers.
8%
13
407

#50. Melting Point
The Ice King is freezing your crops. Find a way to thaw them out.
$1,013,760-1,267,200
You defeated the ice wizards that were casting spells on your crops.
The ice wizards froze your soldiers to death.
8%
13
420

#51. Revenge
Pirates have been destroying your villages. Find the pirate camps and destroy them.
$1,105,920-1,382,400
You annihilated the pirate camp.
The pirates drove away your attacking soldiers.
8%
13
433

#52. Invading Forces
Kill the ice gremlins trying to invade your kingdom.
$1,382,400-1,728,400
You melted the ice creatures into little puddles.
The ice creatures were too much for your soldiers to handle.
8%
13
446

Bonus: 17m.

#53. Push them Back
Drive the pirates back to their ship.
$1,658,880-2,073,600
The pirates fled your kingdom, leaving behind their loot.
The pirate forces were too powerful for you to defeat.
7%
15
461

#54. Escort Convoy
Protect your convoy from the Ice King's bandits.
$1,935,360-2,419,200
You delivered the convoy safely.
Your convoy was captured.
7%
15
476

#55. Voice in the Dark
Investigate the mysterious creatures your villagers have spotted in the night.
$2,211,840-2,764,800
You found and eliminated some hell hounds.
The demon creatures killed your soldiers.
7%
15
491

20m bonus

#56. Icy Grip
Free a village that has been overrun by the Ice King's army.
$2,488,320-3,110,400
Your freed a captured village.
The enemy was too strong and annihilated your rescue team.
7%
15
506

#57. Gates of Hell
Demon portals have opened up near the outskirts of your village. Kill the monsters coming through them.
$2,764,800-3,456,000
You defeated the demons and closed the portal.
The demons overwhelmed your forces.
6%
17
523

#58. Facing the Storm
Kill the ice wizards that are causing blizzards throughout your kingdom.
$3,041,280-3,801,000
You defeated the wizards and stopped the blizzards.
The blizzards wiped out your army.
6%
17
540

30m gold. 5 crystals.

Next set of quests.

#59. Living Dead
The dead are rising and attacking your villagers. Kill the zombies.
$3,317,760 - 4,147,200
You put the dead back where they belong, in their graves.
Your soldiers were turned into zombies.
8%
13
553

#60. Disruption
Destroy the Ice King's supply routes.
$3,594,240 - 4,492,800
You destroyed the supply route and stole their convoys.
The enemy soldiers defeated your army.
7%
15
568

Bonus: 17m

#61. The Darkness
Darkness has covered your kingdom and demons are causing trouble.
$3,870,720 - 4,838,400
You brought light back to your kingdom, killing the demons that hide in the dark.

6%
17
585

#62. Push them Back
Drive the Ice King's settlements out of your kingdom.
$4,147,200 - 5,184,000
You destroyed a settlement.

6%
17
602

Bonus: 20m

#63. Evil Temples
Destroy the demon temples that are appearing across your land.
$4,423,680 - 5,529,600
You took down the demon temple.
The demon guards drove you away.
6%
17
619

#64. The Edge of Winter
The Ice King's army has amassed at your kingdom's border. Confront them in battle!
$4,700,160 - 5,875,200
You massacred their army and drove them from your borders.
The Ice King's army was too much for your soldiers to handle.
5%
20
639

#65. Rescue Mission
Free a village that has been captured by the demons.
$4,976,640 - 6,220,800
You freed the village from the grips of evil.
The evil demons were too powerful for you to defeat.
5%
20
659

Bonus: 30m, 5 health crystals

Most difficult quests unlocked

#66. Army of the Damned
Kill the demon infantry that has been attacking your outposts.
$5,253,120-6,566,400
You eliminated the infantry unit.
The infantry unit defeated your soldiers.
7%
15
674

#67. Free from Evil
Kill the demon sorcerers that are turning your villagers into demon slaves.
$5,529,600-6,912,000
You killed the demon soldiers and prevented your villagers from being turned.
Your villagers were turned into demons and killed your soldiers.
3%
34
708

#68. Kill them All!
Demons are running rampant throughout your kingdom. Kill them all!
$5,806,080-7,257,600
You hunted down and killed all the demons you could find.
Your attack party was lost.
2%
50
758

Bonus: 350m, 5 crystals.

#69. Enemy's Gate
Attack the gates of hell!
$6,082,560-7,603,200
Your soldiers were triumphant and drove the demons back to hell.
The demons are much too powerful and trampled your army.
1%
100 (depressing, isn't it?)
858

Bonus: 500m, 10 health crystals


CONGRATULATIONS!!!






Dillybar's Quest Guide

 

Anything I missed please say 

Edit 2023-03-30: wow, finally a use for a reserved comment!
As of a couple years or so ago, nobs were removed as a possible random quest drop. Unsure about xtals since they were always so rare, but I assume those random rewards are also nixed.
I can't update the original post because of the most recent post length restrictions (i.e. my current post is too long, so I can't save it fresh with new info. I think I'd have to cut it in half or so to do so).

 

I THINK i'm missing a FEW conpleteion rewards. Maybe one or two not sure. Added as found

 

Gotta get to page tqo

 

Worth the wait maki? Lol

thanks ducky 

 

Page 2! Hi Mary

 

Wait you're on pc now? I just realized I assumed you were still on your iPod lol

 

Umm. 

Sorry couldn't resist.
Hi dani!

 

I wouldve! I was going to! But I forgot 

 

 (>•_•)>?