The Gamble - a short story of sorts

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Khajiit, Sep 4, 2014.

  1. The Gamble

    He took in the details of the small bank as he walked through the door of the bank, roughly 15 minutes before it closed, putting every detail to memory.

    The main area was roughly 20 metres by 5 a doorway at the back lead to offices among other things. To his right was the cashier’s counter where a rather puzzled looking woman sat at. He ignored her and kept looking around the empty room, which was sparsely decorated with some old, worn looking chair at one side next to a notice board with information on the banks latest offers. The only window in the room was the skylight which somehow defied the laws of physics and managed to light up the entire room despite the overcast sky.

    The fact that he was the only person in the place was good, along with the fact that there was only one cashier on duty at the time was even better, it made the next step of his plan that much easier to pull off.

    The man who had walked in the door looked slightly overweight thanks to the second set of clothes he had on underneath the dull grey tracksuit that he had on, The bag he was wearing looked as if it had lived an eventful life and was now close to giving up the ghost on its owner. Stains dotted it and several parts of it were torn and well worn down by continued use, but like the second pair of clothes under the tracksuit it would serve its next purpose well when the time came. The mask that covered the front of his head and face was one of the devils, or at least the Halloween variant of it.

    “May I help you?” the voice of the cashier was one of uneasiness as would anyone else’s if a masked man walked into a bank with armed with who knows what.

    In response the man walked slowly up to the counter and put a crumpled note in the tray in front of the cashier. The woman took it and read what it said.

    There is a bomb in the bank, unless you do exactly as I say it will go off.

    The cashier looked up, her face full of horror and fear at what was on the note. A reasonable reaction to a threat of violence and death the man thought to himself as he waited for the woman to speak once more.

    “What… what do you want?” her voice wavering when she wanted to sound strong, as if she was somehow in command of the situation despite the contrary being true. The man in grey noticed immediately noticed this and took advantage of her fear.

    “If you ever want to see your family again you are going to open the door, take this bag and empty the contents of the safe behind you into it. Otherwise you might not leave here alive.”

    The woman looked as if she was about to burst into tears as she stumbled off the seat and made her way over to open the locked door to retrieve the bag. The man knew how critical it was to get the next part right, too much fear and she was be too slow putting the money into the bag, too little and she would try something brave and stupid.

    The woman opened the door and the man gave her the tattered looking bag, to fill with the contents of the safe but as she made her way over to the safe she stopped and looked at the man.

    Her eyes were filled with fury and would have been almost scary had it not been for the tears that were balling up on the edge of her eyes.

    “The thing about trying to be a hero is that this isn’t a story book where the good guy always wins, this is the real world where the hero doesn’t always make it through the story alive. Now, be a good girl and put whatever is in the safe in the bag.”

    With that, the notion of fury and defiance left her eyes almost as soon as it had reached them, her shoulders slumped down she made her way back to the safe and started entering the combination into the piece of steal and metal that stood between him and his next payday.

    Click. Whirl. Click. Whirl. Click.

    The slow rhythmic sounds of a safe being unlocked reached the man’s ears, it was a comforting sound the man thought to himself, and one that was very familiar to the man that stood there waiting.

    “It’s all in the bag, what do you want me to do with it now?” her voice was shaking like a leaf now, any more threats and she was likely to break down right there and start sobbing, which would have been exactly the opposite of what he wanted.

    “Put the bag at the door, give me the keys and lock it again.”

    At that tears started rolling down her cheeks and she started her shaky walk to the door once again, this time it felt like a death sentence. The words that were written on the note coming to the front of her mind to remind her of her impending doom.

    Without a word she silently handed him the bag and key and looked at him with a desperate expression as she closed the door over to trap herself in her make-shift prison.

    He put the bag over his shoulders ready to make his escape out the back door of the building.

    “But what about the bomb, what about me?” The voice whispered behind him.

    “I guess we’ll know the answer to that question in… about 5 minutes from now.” He whispered back, his voice void of emotion.

    And with that he walked out the door and left her standing there; shell-shocked, to face whatever fate had in store for her.

    ----

    So, let me know what you lot think, constructive criticism only please.
     
  2. Screw you and your suspense. :lol:


    Looks good to me bro
     
  3. Dang good
     
  4. You repeat the same words too much